Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Community College Notes

I hate to do it, but I feel overwhelmingly compelled to. Yes, that's right, I am going to blog a few aspects of my personal life. I am breaking this rule of Derogatory Statements because it has a lot to do with what I've been thinking lately.
Here are the notes I took in my English 100 class yesterday unedited:
- Writing is voodoo
- community college blows, you will not get a quality education out of one
- The girl in front of me won't leave her purse alone, it must be her
lifeline.
- It is disgusting that this college lets banks, credit card companies, and magazine sales companies post their advertisements in our classrooms, seems a bit fishy to me
- This teacher is retarded, retarded but she has an MA in ?something? - She just said "Yoga bitch!"
- Fuck!!!!! This class is going to blow
- I need 4 notebooks or something like that
- I think the guy sitting next to me is homeless, he smells, and has grass stains all over his shoes
Now I will attempt to explain just why I wrote these sorts of things in class.
- Writing is voodoo
It seems to me that some people have studied the English language for so long that they have begun to assign it special magic powers that it of course does not possess. Or perhaps they have studied it so passionately because they originally thought that it had magic powers. For example: an essay about a boring topic, if written well, will be a pleasure to read. Or also, if you use enough big words people will think you are smarter and your essay about "a bunch of crap" will mean more to them.
I'm sorry but if a person can express their ideas clearly and SIMPLY, then what more do they need to know. Apparently to be a student in college you have to nitpick the grammar and composition of writing and speaking to death. Apparently you need to know more about the English language than you know about the rest of the world we live in. And of course, (I never get sick of hearing this) 'You'll be surprised how much of what you learn here will be useful later in life.' Surprise! You won't be using any of it.
- community college blows, you will not get a quality education out of one
I say this because the quality of instructors I have encountered so far seems to be lacking. I couldn't possibly imagine these people teaching at a real university.
- The girl in front of me won't leave her purse alone it must be her lifeline.
She kept getting into her little blue purse. She got out her glasses, some lip balm, and dug around in there at least 20 times without actually getting anything out of it. The strange thing was, she did this all one-handed and every time she opened and closed it. I kept thinking "Why don't you just leave it open if you're going to get back into it in 10 minutes?"
- It is disgusting that this college lets banks, credit card companies, and magazine sales companies post their advertisements in our classrooms, seems a bit fishy to me
There were advertisements for all kinds of scams on the bulletin board. In fact there were more scam advertisements up there than there were flyers about school activities. These institutions have no principle whatsoever; I can't believe they tolerate this sort of thing. The student government gets money for putting up this garbage in our classrooms. I just think it shows an attitude of apathy towards the well being of the students.
How many college students are overwhelmed by credit card debt and bills for things they thought they could afford but can't? The answer is probably most, and these sick fucking people know this and they exploit it to its fullest. They don't care about America or its students they only care about money. They don't care if what they are doing is wrong or harmful to society, they just have someone's pockets to fill and that's their job.
- This teacher is retarded, retarded but she has an MA in ?something?
Well she just doesn't seem to be the brightest bulb in the chandelier. I find that of the graduate students I've encountered in my lifetime, not a whole lot of them are as smart as you'd think they would be. Let's put it this way for as long as she's been speaking, studying, and teaching English she sure does mess it up. Crap you should hear her read, she reads out loud like a 12 year old.
- She just said "Yoga bitch!"
She told us this amusing story about when she was in school and her professor took yoga. Her professor would expected them to be there at 12 but sometimes wouldn’t show up herself until 12:30 without informing the students because she was at her yoga class, hence the “Yoga Bitch!”
- Fuck!!!!! This class is going to blow
I don’t really need to explain this do I? It’s a pass/fail with a lot of garbage essay writing.
- I need 4 notebooks or something like that
I have to get a system for keeping four different sets of notes, some of which will have to be turned in. Yay!
- I think the guy sitting next to me is homeless, he smells, and has grass stains all over his shoes
He shows up late, is 10 minutes late getting back from our 10-minute break, and doesn’t have anything including a pen. His hair is all screwed up on his head like he just woke up. He smells something fierce, like cigarettes, turf, butthole, and laundry that haven’t been washed in a month. In fact his laundry has all of the appearances of not being washed, ever. I'm specualting that he mows lawns for a living due to the grass stains on his sneakers, he'd probably call it landscaping.
At least he isn’t one of those compulsive jigglers who make the desks jiggle all of the time from bouncing their knee up and down. But why the fuck did he have to sit right next to me? I obviously make him nervous, as I intended to, but for some reason he had to sit right next to me. Maybe it’s because I made the dumb mistake of making eye contact when he walked in the room 20 minutes late. Really though it’s hard not to want to look into the eyes of the excessively late if but only to wonder what could possibly make them so tardy.
So that’s what my English 100 class is like, I honestly didn’t learn anything else from it. Partly because their was nothing to learn and partly because I couldn’t keep my mind focused on the drivel pouring out of the instructors face hole.

‘Derogatory

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you hate that class so much, and if the ideas in it are so wrong, then why go? And don't tell me that it is because the class is required...you are not forced to go, you are choosing to be there...maybe give it a chance..maybe the teacher (as weird as he/she might be) may be doing something to inspire some ideas or to indirectly teach some aspects of writing. Give it a shot, or get the hell out.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005 9:45:00 AM  
Blogger Derogatory said...

I have to go, IF I want a degree. I can't even take a different english class without taking this one first.
Also, I never said I hated it. I just don't think I'm going to enjoy it as much as my psych class. I'm sure I will learn something useful in this class, it's just that it will be a painful morsel of knowledge to achieve.
I really wasn't as serious as you seem to think I was.
Please click the "Other" button when asked to input your name. You can still be anonymous if you don't want me to know who you are. It's just that I can't tell if every anonymous poster is the same person or not. So just make up a moniker for which you will be known in the comments of my blog.
Anyways thanks for commenting.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005 11:31:00 PM  
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